Black Eyes

and i saw it wasn't there

where it had seemed to be before like a

palpable thickness where i could sink and not fear being lost

because the darkness was only on the surface

but his eyes are not open to me anymore

i still sink into those dark orbs,

but the thickness that before i could swim through and past

is a hard wall of black

i want to grab my hands into the thick of that blackness,

grasp the swarm of velvet hair and yank with such force

that tufts of that velvet wall come screaming out,

leaving peep holes where black velvet has been thinned to empty patches

i want to hold that blackness, feel the coldness of it

and let my warmth sink in and radiate through,

like a worm eating its way through soil

to reach the sun - let the dirt sift through my fingers

and warm from winter to spring

but i'm afraid the cold of that wall would only seep

into my hands as they grab hold,

winning out over the warmth as it eats through